How in tarnation is it already September? It really is true that you lose all concept of time once you’re out of school (milk it for all it’s worth, kids!)
Since it’s still not technically Autumn yet (I go by the solstices. Come on, September 23rd!) I’m not going to do the customary “Things I Love About Fall” post quite yet. Don’t get me wrong, I do love Fall! But even though things in DC have cooled down a touch as of late, it is still very much Summer. That pumpkin spice latte can wait a few more weeks.
That being said, the realization that it is suddenly the last quarter of 2011 hit me pretty hard yesterday. Thanks to someone (::coughmysistercough::), I realized something mildly horrifying about my weight loss journey thus far. Yes, I have lost upwards of 60 pounds in the past year, which I consider to be a serious accomplishment (though I sometimes have to remind myself of that, especially in comparison to some of you other amazing people who have lost more and done it better than me, haha.) BUT! As Jenny so lovingly reminded me while we were chatting yesterday, in all of 2011, of which we are entering into the ninth month, I’ve lost less than 20 of those pounds. Urk.
January 2011 (~207 lbs) vs. August 2011 (189 lbs)
So I have come to this embarrassing revelation, and am now kind of having a meltdown about it.
Thanks sis. (December 2008)
You all know that I’m no stranger to indulging. My motto is that life’s too short not to be able to eat french fries or cupcakes; a healthy, balanced life is not about deprivation. I’ve been saying for a while now that I’d rather it take me a year to lose twenty pounds if I am enjoying my life, than to lose it in 3 months while being miserable.
Well, that’s still true, but I think I’m finally exiting denial-ville about exactly how frequently and how much I’ve been indulging. Because pretty soon it’ll have been a year. And I will have lost 20 pounds. And, surprise, surprise, I’m not really thrilled about that.
I’m sure every single one of my family members is rolling their eyes at this post, since they’ve all been telling me this for a while, but just like when I started my weight loss journey, it all depended on me coming to terms with it on my own. I’m just difficult like that. But whaddya know? Here I finally am.
So, for about the bajillionth time this week, I’m strengthening my resolve. I’m going back to basics and back to what I know works. Keep an eye out for the return of Daily Eats posts that I’ve been majorly slacking on this past month. Calorie counting is a pain in the butt, but it’s making a comeback (losing weight isn’t easy, after all. We know this.) I know that I can’t expect to lose 35 pounds in 4 months like I did when I was obese, that’s just silly. But I can expect more of myself than this. Than losing the same pound over and over again. Than seeing the scale go down only to go back up again.
I still have a long way to go. Let’s do this.