A Glass Case of Emotions

If you’ve been reading this blog for any reasonably significant amount of time, by now you probably know the following things about me:

1. I seriously love to eat.

2. I seriously love my birthday.

3. I seriously love my dogs.

4. I am otherwise rarely serious about anything.

5. I have a lot of feelings.

And while I actually do have something to post about that falls in line with points 1 & 2 (because, you know, I haven’t posted enough about all the ridiculous amounts of food I’ve been consuming lately or anything), today, I shall be addressing points 3 & 5. Thus, recapping the grand birthday dinner I had with my family on Friday will simply have to wait (my mom has been out of town for the past month, so we waited to celebrate until she got back) because I have other things to report.

SO! Let’s start things off with Saturday night and the first time I cried that night. (I told you: FEELINGS.) My wonderful sister texted me earlier when I was out with Sean, asking me when I’d be home because she wanted to Facetime. Given that there is very little that we sisters cannot communicate via our wicked fast texting fingers (honestly, I think between Jenny and me we could probably beat some kinda record), I was already slightly suspicious that something was afoot. I was a little worried that perhaps my older and wiser sister had befallen the myth that you can’t get pregnant while breastfeeding and my perfect little niece Mia would be getting an Irish twin.

IMG_1031
Say what now?

My suspicions arose further when Jenny proceeded to Facetime me within 60 seconds of walking back in the door of my house, all but proving the fact that she had been stalking me via the “Find My Friends” app. And yes, there was indeed a reason for the call, though it was nothing like what I expected. My sister proceeded to put Mia on the phone (for lack of a better image), and, in a voice that sounded suspiciously like my sister’s, just 3 octaves higher, “Mia” asked me if I would do her the honor of being her godmother.

I mean, c’mon. Do I even need to tell you that this is when the waterworks started?

IMG_1028
Pull yourself together, woman.

I managed to utter a garbled “Yes!” between sobs of happiness, and then proceeded to watch my sister feed Mia prune juice through an eyedropper 1,400 miles away (TECHNOLOGY!). It was really a very special moment… up until the part where, y’know, she spit up prune juice. Which, coincidentally, also happened to be the part of the evening where I discovered the remnants of a VERY THOROUGHLY DESTROYED packet of Orbit gum on the stairs of my house. Which brings us to our second emotional point of the evening.

529445_10101052382349209_287092231_n
Caught in the act.

Oh, the joys of dog ownership. On a routine basis, you might find your dirty underwear strewn about the house, food wrappers fished out from the garbage, or a panic poop in the basement. At least they generally have the decency to act guilty/apologetic about it, although in this particular case Harry didn’t seem to think anything was amiss. Daxter’s guilt, on the other hand, was evident–he does this automatic ears-back rollover thing that is so cute you automagically forget why you’re mad (see above picture). I didn’t think too much of the incident, seeing as how my dogs have eaten a lot worse things than a couple sticks of gum, IMO (like the time Harry ate half a FILET MIGNON off my end table, or when Daxter polished off half a bag of Fizzing Whizbees from Harry Potter World…). In fact, I thought it was funny, and so I posted about it on Instagram and Facebook.

daxter orbit

And it was kinda funny. That is, until I started getting flooded with messages about how sugarfree gum–like Orbit–contains an artificial sweetener called xylitol. And xylitol, unbeknownst to me, is really, REALLY toxic to dogs. Like, not just like “Oh, you probably shouldn’t feed that pizza crust to your dog because they don’t digest wheat as well as humans”-bad, but “Well, now your dog’s blood is being flooded with a huge amount of insulin and his organs are probably going to start failing within the next thirty minutes and HE WILL DIE”-bad.

Yeah… so, in hindsight, I’m gonna go ahead and say that Googling “xylitol dogs” really didn’t do much to help the situation. Enter: Phase 2 of crying (and this is, clearly, not the good kind of crying).

Anyway, needless to say, at this point I am FREAKING THE EFF OUT. Harry and Daxter weren’t exhibiting any strange behavior, but since we didn’t know A) how much gum they actually ate or B) which dog even did the eating, I knew it was better safe than sorry and there was no question as to what to do. Sean and I threw both dogs in the car and zoomed off to the emergency vet. Which, of course, considering my dogs’ proclivity for bad things happening to them, is a route I know all too well at this point.

IMG_8129.jpg

We got to the vet, I explained the situation (in tears), and they immediately took both dogs into the back to check them out. Meanwhile, I learned that there is an animal poison control hotline that I needed to call (still in tears). They asked me a bunch of questions as to exactly what was ingested, and what the worst-case scenario was in terms of how much gum they ate. Thankfully–THANKFULLY–it turns out that Orbit as a brand has low xylitol amounts, and even if one of my dogs <25 lb. dogs had eaten half a pack (7 pieces), they likely would have been okay. At this point, the vet had already made both dogs throw up, so I did find out that Harry was the sole culprit in terms of actually consuming the gum (though Daxter had a field day with the cardboard wrapper, which I guess explains why he was acting guilty?) but I could take them home that night. I would just have to monitor them for signs of hypoglycemia and my regular vet would likely follow up and want to run some blood tests.

IMG_1368
And nobody at the clinic even commented on the fact that Daxter is still pink.

All in all, I realize I got pretty lucky: There were only a few pieces of gum left in the pack, and I have some VERY thoughtful friends and blog readers who alerted me to the danger quickly. Because, honestly, if they hadn’t told me, I might never have known! Although I guess if we’re going that route, I also would not have known if I didn’t constantly exploit my dogs via my various social media channels. So clearly the lesson here is: Post everything about your life to social media!

Oh, c’mon, I kid, I kid. In truth, I really have learned a valuable lesson about the dangers of anything that contains xylitol (which is mainly sugarfree gum, but also some jams, jellies, and baked goods) when it comes to my pets. And to me, the peace of mind in knowing that both my furbabies are okay was worth the outrageously high vet bill… and I say that only, like, 40% begrudgingly.

So there you have it. One Saturday night, MORE than enough emotional roller-coastering to last me until at least the end of the week. Whew. I am emotionally drained just having rehashed the experience for you guys.

Have you ever had a pet medical scare? I feel like at this point I have had more than my fair share with both dogs… It’s all worth it, obviously, but still. Oy.

Happy

Happy Valentine’s Day, friends!

Untitled

Harry and Daxter got to spend a large chunk of yesterday at their favorite place in whole wide world: the groomer! So they came home sporting gentlemanly beards and heart-spotted Valentine’s bandannas. Oh, how I love my tiny old man dogs. Heeee. šŸ˜€

Untitled
Why did you do this to me?

Valentine’s Day is one of those “holidays” (I use the term loosely) that I’ve always really liked, even when I wasn’t romantically attached. I know a lot of single people rally against this day, but I dunno. I guess that even when I wasn’t in a relationship, I just liked what the day stands for. Love, y’know? Because, let’s be honest, I am a huuuuuge drippy romantic cheeseball at heart. (This should really not surprise anyone though. I mean, you guys have seen how into weddings I am. I am pretty ridiculous.)

Sean is keeping me in the dark about our Valentine’s Day plans tonight, the wonderful jerk. He absolutely LOVES planning surprises and I am the wooooorst at waiting patiently for them. I have a love-hate relationship with surprises, actually. I love the IDEA of being surprised, but I also want to know everything ever ahead of time (I’m the kind of person who actually loves reading spoilers for movies, haha). So all I know is that we have dinner reservations SOMEWHERE in DC. But other than that, zilch. Hopefully he a least got the memo about me giving up sweets and desserts for Lent though (what unfortunate timing!) and forewent the box o’ chocolates this year. I wonder if an Edible Arrangement would count against my Lenten sacrifice? šŸ˜‰

Anyway! Since I have no idea where we’re going or what we’re doing, I guess I’ll report back in tomorrow with the V-Day celebration. In the meantime, I hope you all have a wonderful Valentine’s Day! Just remember to bask in the love, mon amis–whether that’s relationshippy love, familial love, or–the best love of all–the canine kind.

Untitled

No Beard, No Problem!

I have a lot of breed loyalty for the miniature schnauzer (um, duh), and one of the things I love most is that they don’t shed. This means less vacuuming for me (huzzah!) and fewer allergic reactions for everyone else (double huzzah!) Their hair just grows and grows, like people hair! That does mean, however, that grooming can get rather tedious. Also just like people, my puppers require regular haircuts to keep their fuzz from getting totally out of control.


The bad part is that a trip to the groomer can cost anywhere from $60 to $100 PER dog! So, in seeking out another alternative, you may already be aware of the fact that I occasionally take Harry & Daxter’s grooming into my own hands. While in the beginning this had borderline disastrous effects


Whoops.

…I’ve actually gotten fairly decent at it lately!

This time, though, I wanted to try something different. Something that my mom probably won’t actually be too happy about, since she’s kind of obsessed with Harry’s beard. Good thing hair always grows back, on schnauzers and humans alike, eh?

IMG_9304.jpg
IMG_9290.jpg

Presenting… the beardless(ish) schnauzers! I chopped off their beards so now they’re both left with what’s more like the schnauzer equivalent of 5 o’clock shadow. Daxter’s actually had his beard almost this short in the past (kind of), but this is a first for Harry. I actually think it makes them look really sweet!

IMG_9301.jpg

Ben, however, thinks it makes them look like rats. I feel like it makes Daxter look more like a puppy again, and makes Harry look a lot younger, too. Of course, he’ll always be a crotchety old man in spirit (and personality) anyway, so there’s only so much that a haircut can do, ahahaha.

IMG_9309.jpg

I’m not sure how the two of them feel about their new haircuts though. Eating and drinking is already a much better experience for me, since less food is getting stuck in their beards and less water drippage is occurring, but they both seemed a little gloomy while I was taking these photos of them.

IMG_9289.jpg IMG_9312.jpg

Perhaps that’s just because they’re totally sick of having cameras shoved into their faces. And to be fair, they were a little on the sleepy side too.

IMG_9306.jpg
IMG_9291.jpg
>IMG_9294.jpg

I rest my case.

Anyway, I think it’s pretty stinkin’ adorable, but we’ll see whether or not this becomes the norm. At least I have the adorableness for now! And through me, you have it as well. You’re welcome. šŸ˜‰

Filler

Oh herro. So I’m not even going to pretend like I have anything new or exciting to report to you all. After this coming weekend, it may be a different story (I’ve got The Dark Knight Rises, a yoga boat cruise, and my sister’s 30th birthday wine tour all happening!) but for now, things are pretty much same old, same old. You know, with the exception of the fact that I’m driving my mom’s sweet ride instead of my own devil car because I enjoy things like staying (relatively) sane.

So here are a few things for you to enjoy in the absence of an actual post from me:

– The engagement photos I took for my brother and his fiancee while we were in St. Maarten are all up on his photography blog! Go check ’em out!

– I posted a Daily Eats post this morning! I shall let the shock settle in for a little bit like that.

– I subscribe to one of those mail-order giftbox things where they send you a bunch of items to try out. You know, like Birchbox does for beauty products, except the one I subscribe to is called Barkbox and it’s, yep, for dog stuff! They recently sent me, among other things, a nifty little towel thing that you use to wipe down your dogs after they come in from the rain. Well, Taylor found it and thought it had a different purpose…


Hahahahahahahaha. I pretty much solely rely on Taylor for photos of the dogs now (she’s doing a 365 Photo Project just like Ben did), so here’s another one of hers for good measure:

Aaaaand that’s about all, folks. Happy Tuesday?

CaR(n)age

Yeah, I was trying to do some sort of clever play on the words “Car”, “Rage”, and “Carnage” for the title of this post, but that didn’t really work out as smoothly as I would have hoped. Oh well, since ultimately this will be but a tiny blip on the life-consuming radar of The Internets, I’m not going to sweat it too much.

I originally intended this post to be all about my hoarding ways, and the means in which I intend to rid myself of them. I’m determined to seriously edit the massive vacuum of STUFF that is my bedroom currently, and wanted to talk about that. Alas, I am a little too ragey to go into the specifics of Stuff Purging right now, so that will have to wait.

I’ve been living through a rather unfortunate bit of deja vu since last night. Remember how my car decided to give me a giant middle finger the night before my birthday, and I spent said birthday in the waiting room of a Sears Auto Shop with naught but my iPhone to keep me company? Well, I got to do it ALL over again when my now still-brand new battery decided to die on me last night. 6 jump starts and a totally unsurprising amount of tears later, I got to spend my entire morning waiting around for my sad, old Chrysler to be fixed.

Untitled

At least this time I had company. Adorable company.

Untitled

I’m looking to get a new (used) car sometime in the not-so-distant future anyway, so my biggest concern was having to dump hundreds and hundreds of dollars into a car that I won’t be driving for long. The mechanics were tossing around concern about the alternator, which I know from past experience (oh, 1987 Honda Prelude, you served me well… kinda) can cost $500+ to replace. Fortunately, the automotive gods took mercy on me this morning and it only ended up being a small post terminal that was all rusted and corroded. $2.99 for the part, $40 for the labor and installation, and I was back on my way. Hopefully this time it sticks!

Okay, thanks for sticking around through my vent sesh, friends. To end on a happy note, here are a couple more pictures of my puppers. They’ve been gracing this blog far too infrequently lately, don’t you think? NEED MOAR SCHNAUZERS!

IMG_7315.jpg

IMG_7313.jpg

Happy Wednesday! We’re halfway there!