Lingual Braces: Week 1

Since today marks the 7th day of the self-imposed torture that is lingual braces, I figured it would be fitting to give you guys an update. Knowledge being power and all that. Beware: an uncomfortable number of uncomfortable-looking selfies is about to follow.

Procedure: The actual process of getting the brackets attached was very straight forward. No drilling, no grinding, just my mouth being propped open (more comfortable than it looks, actually!) while a dental prodded around in there to clean and prepare my teeth for bonding, and then the orthodontist coming in to attach each individual bracket (I have 8 total) and insert the wire. There was some gel stuff that tasted horrible, and some UV light wand stuff, but it wasn’t painful or even that uncomfortable. It was fast, too — I think the total amount of time I spent at the orthodontist’s was 1 hour and 15 minutes, and that included talking to the orthodontist for a while and getting new photos and x-rays taken of my teeth.

Aesthetics: As you can see from the photo above, in which I’m rocking my colors for the big game — the Puppy Bowl, of course — my braces are virtually undetectable. In fact, the only way you’d be able to see them is if you were looking up at an angle, into my mouth.

Or if I was eating a hand-mirror.

In fact, you’re more likely to see the fillings in my back molars than you are to see my braces. Which is great, because obviously the aesthetic factor is the entire reason I chose this method of tooth straightening… and is pretty much the only good thing about them so far, because unfortunately it’s all downhill from here.

Speaking: Speaking is a total bitch. There, I said it. I knew that I would likely have some kind of lisp or impeded speech when the braces were inserted, but I didn’t think it would be as bad as it is. In fact, when I first got the braces put in, my lisp really wasn’t that bad, but it worsened by about 500% the next day. I think this is because my tongue got irritated after the first day, swelling up slightly, getting cut up, and it just hasn’t gone back to normal yet. So my lisp is exacerbated by the fact, in addition to the metal brackets taking up space behind my teeth, my tongue feels bigger and my mouth feels simultaneously dry AND producing more saliva than normal.

Every article I’ve read, video I’ve watched, and forum I’ve browsed says that speaking will get better, and my lisp will let up as I get used to the braces, but right now I have to admit that it feels like that will never happen. I’m super self-conscious about how I sound, and it sucks, especially when you talk as frequently and emphatically as I do.

Pain: Immediately after the braces went on, I felt a little pressure on my teeth but I wouldn’t say it hurt. In fact, the entire first day I was basking in my clearly superior pain tolerance and how easy this was going to be. Of course, I ended up eating my words (since I can’t eat much else) the very next morning, because as soon as I woke up my gums (and head) were throbbing. The pain of my actual teeth moving, however, is fairly manageable because ibuprofen works pretty well against it. You know what ibuprofen doesn’t work too well against though? Tongue pain.

Ugh, the tongue pain. For some reason it did not occur to me in the slightest that my tongue would get irritated — actually, I think pissed off is a more accurate term — from having all this metal imposed into its space. I thought about the tooth pain — pain I’ve experienced before from my teenage battle with braces — and knew I’d be able to handle that, but I never considered the tongue part. IT HURTS. My tongue basically has cuts all down the sides from where it rubs up against the write that is poking out from the last brackets. It doesn’t actually hurt on the tip of my tongue, where it touches the brackets on my front teeth, but hot damn, the side/back of my tongue is KILLING me. And to make matters worse, I’ve developed a canker sore/tongue ulcer/hot white spot of DEATH on the underside of my tongue, which hurts so much that touching it actually makes me cry. It hurt so much Saturday night that I could barely sleep (I picked up some Orajel to numb it, but unfortunately that stuff only works for like, 10 minutes at a time. And it tastes awful and it makes my throat feel weird and numb when I swallow it.)

So unfortunately, there isn’t much I can do except pray that, just like how I got blisters on my fingers when I taught myself how to play the guitar, eventually my tongue will develop some kind of callus or otherwise adapt. And pray that it will happen SOON. I have wax that I can put over the wires and brackets to help a little bit (you can kind of see it in the mirror pic above), but a lot of damage was already done by the time I started using it, so even with the wax it still hurts when anything comes in contact with the raw part of my tongue… which it does every time I swallow, or speak, or chew, or do anything really. This is the primary reason why it’s been a torturous experience thus far.

Eating: Well, I suppose you could see this as a good thing or a bad thing, because, yes, eating has definitely changed for me. The first couple of days, biting down was quite painful — in fact, anything touching my teeth pretty much sucked. So I could eat soft, easily-swallowable stuff (soups, stew, applesauce, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese, mussels, etc.) and *kind of* chew it (since I don’t have brackets on my back teeth), but biting into anything with my front teeth was (and still kind of is) out of the question. Mostly I found myself “chewing” with my tongue — by pushing the soft stuff up onto the roof of my mouth with my tongue. Unfortunately, this caused more irritation to my tongue because it meant even more contact with the pokey wires.

As my teeth themselves don’t hurt quite as much now, I’ve found I can bite things a little more easily — though, of course, I then risk getting food stuck in my braces. I’ve successfully eaten pasta, a muffin, a chicken wing, and even like two bites of a burger before I just decided to fork-and-knife it. Chewing with my back teeth isn’t too bad, except for the aforementioned tongue-rubbing… I guess I don’t really need to go on. The basic point is we use our tongue for everything, and having it be all busted up is awful in many ways. I also eat INCREDIBLY slowly, which I guess is the good part, because I get full more easily and am obviously (as evidenced by my calorie counts from last week) eating a lot less. I guess it’s also good/bad that I’m brushing my teeth 8329429489 times a day now (after every single meal, snack, non-water beverage, and sometimes just because my teeth/tongue feel nasty) so I should have the cleanest and whitest teeth in the world by the time this is over.

Other thoughts: As you already know, I decided to only get braces on my top teeth, feeling that my top teeth are what bothered me because they are so visible, and thinking there wasn’t too much wrong with my bottom teeth. HOWEVER, my orthodontist felt quite differently. He was, in fact, very clear to point out all the ways that my bite sucks, my teeth as a whole are jacked, and warned me several times about how fixing my top teeth would do nothing to align my bite or fix all the things that are wrong with my teeth. (Judgy much?) So, unfortunately, that consultation only served to highlight how le terrible my bottom teeth are, when I didn’t really have a problem with them before.

Of course, aside from the whole aesthetic thing, there’s also the fact that opting to only work on my top teeth is much, MUCH less expensive than an entire mouthful of braces. Alas, though, all this time spent looking at my mouth and teeth is making me SO aware of my bottom teeth crowding and my bite… I dunno. I may look at getting them fixed at some point in the future as well. It’s not really helping that for some reason, on days 5 + 6 my bottom teeth started hurting a little bit too — even though there’s no braces on them! I wonder if it’s like, teeth sympathy pain, or if it’s because my bite as a whole is being shifted ever so slightly. I’ve heard it’s pretty popular for people to get traditional braces on the bottom since they aren’t so readily visible, but I’m unsure. Guess that’s a bridge I’ll cross if/when I come to it.

At this point in time, I’d be lying if I said it’s been worth it. This experience has been way more painful than I anticipated, I think I sound awful when I speak, and while I can already tell it’s working (my teeth aren’t straight yet or anything, of course, but one has already moved enough so that one of my bottom teeth doesn’t touch one of the brackets anymore when I clench my teeth, which it did when they were first applied), I’m just generally miserable. I know I did this to myself, so I really shouldn’t complain, but believe me when I say that you would be complaining too. The thought has already occurred to me more than once to just throw in the towel and call it quits, although the fact that I probably wouldn’t get my $1,000 down payment back is a big influencing factor in attempting to stick it out.

After all, it’s only been a week, and they all say it gets better, so it has to, right? RIGHT?!

Being Productive

What is more productive than being stuck at home for two days straight with intense kidney stone pain? Why,vlogging, of course! In keeping with my past attempts, I am continuing to try to up the ante in terms of production value. Enter my brother’s amazing (er, expensive) camera and me spending 10 minutes just trying to focus the lens (and still not totally succeeding.) Oh well!

That may or may not be Vampire Diaries paused in the background. NO JUDGING.

To sum up the video for those of you who can’t watch it yet, I feel much, much better (thank you so much for your concern and well wishes!) According to Le Doctor, this means I either passed the kidney stone or never had one to begin with (I am rather skeptical of the latter hypothesis, for obvious reasons.) I’m not super thrilled at the fact that I’ve used up two days of PTO from work, since I’m taking more days off for my trip to Ottawa over Halloween weekend, but there’s not much I can do about that now. What I can do, however, is figure out a cute, creative Halloween costume that is carry-on-able so I can take it with me when I go! Hopefully you guys can help out with that one, since my creativity feels pretty spent at present moment (for what reason though, I couldn’t tell you. Maybe I’m just not as creative as I like to think, hahaha.)

48/365 This Is Not The Enemy
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In other news, I weighed in this morning but I’m making yet another executive decision NOT to officially report it here since I don’t feel it really counts. Don’t get me wrong, I would LOVE to be able to count it, seeing as how two days of pain, irregular eating, and the inability to, er, hold onto my food (gross!) has brought me not one, not two, but THREE pounds lost. However, I’m not stupid (well, not always, anyway) so I know it’s not a “real” loss. And now that my appetite is finally back, things are sure to go right back to where they were. I’m eager to keep the false hope to a minimum, haha.

Hopefully these fading twinges of pain mean that I can get on track with training for the 15K. I’ve actually decided to follow a training plan FORREALZ (whaaaat?!) So today I’ll see if I’m up to some yoga and tomorrow I’ll be on Thursday of Week 3: 2m + strength training. It feels oddly good to have a set schedule like this! Even though I fully acknowledge I’ll probably be terrible at sticking to it. It’s the thought that counts, right? 🙂

Any halloween costume ideas for me? Remember: needs to be packable, TSA-approved, and awesome. You are all much, much more creative than me soooo… HALP!

Kidney vs. Stone: Round 2

Oh hey! Remember when this happened? Well, apparently life decided that one kidney stone epidemic in 11 months was simply not enough. Enter the excruciating pain that began Sunday on the drive back from the wedding and, despite all my best efforts, would not quit.

At first I thought the pain was simply due to gas (you’re welcome for that) but after waking up in the middle of the night desperately clutching my abdomen I figured something was slightly more amiss. Unlike last time, I didn’t go to the ER this time around. Therefore, I can’t be 100% certain that it’s a kidney stone (er, not that the hospital was actually able to make a timely diagnosis last time anyway. Awkward.) But what I do know is that it’s in the same spot and it’s the same kind of pain (though, blessedly, slightly less severe than last time) so I think I can pretty safely assume. Unfortunately, armed with the knowledge from my last unfortunate experience, I know that there’s really nothing to do but wait to pass it.

It’s hard to describe kidney stone pain. Its severity ebbs and flows, comes and goes in intensity. But at its worst, I would say it kind of feels like a small, serrated knife is slowly slicing through the walls of your gut. You’re extra welcome for that imagery. Having a kidney stone is often compared to childbirth (though I obviously wouldn’t know on a personal level) and is legitimately the most excruciating thing I have ever experienced. Needless to say, it’s a pain (har har… ow, laughing hurts.)

So yesterday I spent an awful lot of time laying prostrate on the bed, streaming episode after episode of The Vampire Diaries on Netflix:

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While dressed in my super flattering PJs:

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God, I’m cool.

Alternating between these two faces:

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With these thoroughly unsympathetic mongrels by my side:

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Harry even had the audacity to roll around in what I have to assume was poop while out in the backyard. Let me tell you: trying to wash a dog when you have kidney stones?

I feel conflicted, because as much as I was hoping the stone would have passed by now and I’d be off scott-free, I’m kind of relieved I haven’t yet. I know that sounds crazy, but you know the saying, “it gets worse before it gets better”? Or how about, “it is always darkest before the dawn”? Well, they especially apply to kidney stones. As bad as it hurts right now, I vividly remember the extraordinary pain that came right before passing the stone, and I am NOT anxious to relive it.

Sleepy
Pity me. Pity me good.

But either way, I know it’s inevitable. So until then… I’m trying to manage the pain as best I can with the over-the-counter drugs in my medicine cabinet, and taking in as much fluid as possible. I have a doctor’s appointment later this morning, and while I know there’s nothing that he can really DO, I’m hoping that he might have some insight as to WHY this is happening. Again. I mean, this is really putting a literal cramp in my race training as well as my PTO balance.

Ever had to deal with kid-nay stooooones of your own? If not, you are a lucky, lucky son of a gun. If so, pray tell. Misery loves company, after all.